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Showing posts from November, 2013

A tale of Thanksgiving and Intrigue, Reprise

I've just discovered that it's after 1:00 and I haven't gotten much done yet today, so I'm re-posting this rather than writing a brand new thanksgiving story. 

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Every year, growing up, my mom would make a dessert for Thanksgiving, which, I later learned, no one else had heard of.  It’s not just “cranberry pudding”, but rather, it’s always referred to as “Aunt Gladys’ steamed cranberry pudding.”

Gladys was my great aunt, a woman I never met.  She was my mother’s actual aunt, and every time my mom made the pudding, she would tell a story about the aunts.  

According to my mother, her mother owned a punch bowl that her sisters would sometimes borrow. (According to my uncle, though, the three sisters shared the punchbowl, which was crystal, with buttons and bows pattern and matching glasses.)  Sharing the punch bowl between three households meant that it would have to be shipped here and there, and there was a great deal of planning involved. It’s a little unclear to me no…

A big rambly horoscope with many bugs and no pictures.

Aries (3/21 – 4/19):  Do people really believe that radiation is getting more concentrated as it approaches the west coast?  Think about it, humans!  That's not how physics works.  Not that leaking radiation is ever a good thing, but a small amount of something dumped into a huge ocean gets diluted, not concentrated.  Sheesh.  Quit going to the dentist and you'll more than make up for it.  (Keep brushing your teeth and flossing, though, Aries. Do I sound more maternal than horoscopal?  Oops.)  Whereever we go, there we are.  Lucky you!  Lift your people up with natural merriment this week.

Taurus (4/20 – 5/20):  I was listening to a podcast about urination the other night (Try not to judge.)  It turns out ... drumroll... that all mammals empty their bladders at the same rate!  Whether you're an elephant with a huge bladder, or a mouse with a tiny one, it takes 21 seconds to empty it!  I think that's the coolest fact I know right now.  I'm going to stop taking the te…

Be Interesting Month!

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I've been thinking a lot about the recent This American Life episode that provides rules on what not to talk about.  I've always assumed it was people who are boring, not topics, but this approach seems much kinder, so I'm in.  The off limits items are below.  I'd like to confess right here that I have done most of these but I'm making a pact right here on the internets to try harder to be interesting.

Route talk  (I agree, this is THE WORST.)Period talk (menstruation)How you sleptDietHealthDreamsMoney I have a few to add: the detailed plots to movies or books.the back story about who's related to who in a minor anecdote.  ("It was my hairdresser's best friend's cousin.  Wait, no, it I guess it was her second cousin.  Well, now that I think about it, it may actually be a neighbor of the cousin.")  This is as bad as route talk.struggling, in the midst of what could be an okay anecdote, to remember what day of the week it was.  "I think it wa…

Horoscopes: the "It's the water" edition

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Aries (3/21 – 4/19):  I tried to go to the long-heralded movie about our town last night but it was cancelled due to weather, the lamest excuse ever.  If you can't watch a movie on a dark rainy night, um, what?  Are we supposed to go hiking?  But anyway, it's a retrospective of our first 100 years, and there was much looking forward to it (say, for 98 years), only to have hopes dashed.  But Aries, we're used to the dashed hopes by now, and that make us stronger, silenter, taller, more prone to believing in psychics, etc. There was a woman in the parking lot of where the movie was supposed to be, leafletting about a radio station she's trying to start.  (Can you call it leafletting if it's just one person handing out papers to three people? Yes, you can!  Is "leafletting" a real verb? No it's not!)  Anyway, the point, Aries, is that the movie is still in the future!  Yes, we still have that to march towards!   This week, it will always seem like the pr…